Thursday, January 24, 2013
A Patch blogger's post about not helping her children on the slide is being debated across the country.
A Patch blog from Alameda, Calif., called “Please Don’t Help My Kids” has struck a nerve with readers across the country. Posted in September, the blog has taken off over the past few weeks as it has found a second life through social media sharing. The blog has 124,000 Facebook recommendations and 833 people have tweeted the blog. The blog is an open letter to other parents at the playground. The blogger Kate Bassford Baker’s basic request is for parents to not help her daughters on the slide. She wrote that she wants her daughters to do things and learn things on their own. Learning to walk up the slide’s ladder is the first step to learning new things and overcoming obstacles, she wrote. “Because, as they grow up, the ladders will …
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Sometimes a stressful time can teach unexpected lessons.
I recently had an experience that gave me a glimpse of how I may be able to better cope with my upcoming labor and delivery. It gave me an opportunity to work through some inner challenges that can help it feel smoother in the end, no matter the interventions. I came down with a kidney stone attack just before the 32-week mark. Having had kidney stones years before, I was pretty confident that my baby would be fine, and fairly certain I was not in labor. What I was in was lots of pain. Ironically, doctors refer to this pain as "colicky", which makes it difficult to sit still, as the abdominal area spasms. It can also bring on a feeling of panic, not unlike labor contractions. Since I was pretty sure I knew what was happening, at first…
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Sometime parenting can feel like I need parenting 101 over and over again.
I was having a chat with a friend recently about parenting. I asked her, sort of matter of fact, why it feels like this parenting thing nearly splits me in two sometimes. It makes me face so many things about myself that can be hard, often on a daily basis. I've got to be outspoken, brave, diplomatic, patient, and dig so deep sometimes I think I'll reach the Earth's core. A part of me honestly thought the hardest part of parenting a little one would be getting up in the night, having a flabby stomach and a messy house. But it is so much more than that. All the stretching, learning, and growing feels like a huge balancing act. What is best for our family, what is best for her, and what society offers intersect and finding harmony is not …
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Getting closer to having my second child has me thinking about the bond I have with my first.
When I was pregnant with my first baby, I became interested in watching TV shows about pregnancy, labor and delivery. Soon-to-be parents would be shown on their way to the hospital in the throes of labor. Often, however, the mother would be crying in the front seat, not because she was worried about the birth of her new baby, but from leaving her first child, a 2 or 3 year old, asleep in his own bed. A sweet aunt or grandmother would be shown caring for her first-born, but in her mind, she had left him “alone.” Another money shot for the show would be a little preschooler climbing into the hospital bed for a final goodbye kiss before mom was made ready for a C-section. Tears would be streaming down her face from under the poufy surgical …
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
About a year and half ago, my family began looking for a preschool in the area for our daughter. When September came, I had to follow my instincts, and they turned out to be spot-on.
This is a follow up to a previous column about the preschool descision which I wrote in December of 2010 called To Preschool or Not to Pre-school. About a year and a half ago, I was the mom of a 2.5 year old, who was adorable, lovable and just beginning to play a bit with other kids, rather than just sitting beside them doing her own thing. We were investigating preschools in the area, but my heart was not really in it, and I wasn't completely convinced preschool was in the future for us at all. I was still in cozy new-mom mode, not ready to give up total control (or the control I believed I had) over my toddler. I was worried about separation anxiety, germs and the possibility of her feeling left out. But, something sent me to …
Monday, March 5, 2012
Or at least it used to be.
This column originally appeared on Brookline Patch in March 21, 2011. It has been updated and is running again in response to a recent push by local educators to get parents involved in math initiatives. I used to do well in math. I have an (unfortunately) very distant memory of getting A's in elementary school math. But that was a long time ago, before two plus two stopped equaling four. It starts out innocently enough. I’ll be making dinner, screeching James Taylor into the spatula, minding my own off-tuned business, when I hear IT. The eight words that bring instant alarm and dread to my gut. “Mom, I need help with my math homework.” How hard can sixth grade math be? I was eleven when I graduated that particular grade. I can do this. I…
Monday, February 27, 2012
Moms Talk looks at what a mother does.
Last week I wrote about how a mother does. She does a lot. Some of my favorite Moms Talkers immediately wrote in adding some of the very special things they do, contributing to a list long enough to wrap itself around the world in a hug. Here are their voices: Kristi G. Reads the same book over, and over, and over... Trying to do it with enthusiasm each time no matter how tired she is of that “Sam I Am,” hoping it will encourage her child's budding love of reading. Rosemarie Harper erin o Stands in line for 7 hours in the wee hours of the morning with her son to get him the latest Harry Potter book. JP I remember staying up at night with my daughter after she had night terrors ... just holding her and singing to her and telling her stories…
Monday, February 20, 2012
A mother is as a mother does ...
While web surfing the other day I came across a poll that asked, “What is a mother?” As the writer of a column entitled Moms Talk, I’d like to think I could answer that question lickety-split. Then the poll continued, “What encompasses the parameters of a mother?” Huh? First of all, I don’t think a mother has any parameters. No boundaries, no limits, nothing to confine her, or her love. Second of all, I’m not sure the most accurate way to phrase the initial question is to ask what a mother is. I think the truer question would be to ask what a mother does. That I can answer … A mother, If you're a mother, then you can continue this list for miles. Tell me what you do in the comment section below. I’ll post your responses in next week’s …
Monday, January 30, 2012
Who knew?
Did you know you are supposed to clean the legs of your wooden chairs? You can be honest, no one’s judging you here. Well I didn’t know, until the day I came home from work to find our housekeeper squirting lemon-fresh Pledge on the curvy-carved veneers of my wannabe French Country chairs. Is this something people do? Sure, if a glob of spaghetti sauce dropped on the chair, I’d give it a swipe, but otherwise it’s safe to say I’ve never given the those chair legs a thought. Seriously, do they even get dirty? I did what I always do when I’m stumped. I called my mother, and sure enough, yes, you should occasionally give attention to the chairs legs. It appears dirt and dust can accumulate there just like anywhere else. Go figure. This is why …
Monday, November 14, 2011
Why do we keep outdated things that don't feel like "us" any longer?
As fall sets in and we spend more time in the house, I’ve noticed how full it has become with stuff. The spring and summer flew by, and as we rushed in and out to have fun in the sun, deep cleaning and keeping order were put on the back burner. Now we are inside, amongst the disorganized toys, clothes and well-loved areas of the house. In an effort to bring some order to my own closet, I pulled a bunch of sweaters from a shelf and several pairs of shoes that will become necessities as winter rolls in. I was listening to music, and just re-folding clothes and wiping off boots without really noticing anything. Then I came to a pair of black slip-on shoes and thought, “Whose are these?” Chunky and practical, dusty and well worn, they had …
Michael Fleming
9:43 am on Saturday, January 26, 2013
Agree. "Play" is actually an activity children use to learn many lessons, test limits, explore their world and learn its rules. When you protect your child from every little micro trauma, he or she learns no lessons, explores no boundaries, finds no knowledge of limits. They wind up living on the basement couch, afraid or unable to deal with a world that offers no such coddling. The author of … more ›